I'M A GENIUS IDOL BUT MY PASSIVE IS SUNFISH: Chapter 1

 TL by Miru

Episode 1

 

"Your destiny is to be a celebrity."

 

A fortune teller's shop in Myeongdong.

That was the place he had entered as if bewitched by a leaflet that advertised <The World's Top 3 Fortune Telling Shops by Forbes>.

It all felt very professional until his date and time of birth were asked about, but now, all he could think was that it was a waste of money.

 

"There is also an attractive charm."

"Attractive? Me?"

"That's right! And incredibly so too!"

 

No wonder. It was already suspicious when the fortune-telling fee had to be paid in advance.

 

"Ah… Is that so?"

 

Baek-Ya (Reserve force/21/Newly discharged) pretended to raise his eyeglasses as he subtly glared at the fortune teller in front of him.

 

'Scammer.'

 

Then, their eyes met, and his conscience got pricked for no reason.

 

"Being a doli is your destiny!"

 

They must have meant idol…

At that moment, Baek-Ya was sure of it.

 

'I've been duped.'

 

The world he came to after 21 months was not easy to deal with.

 

* * *

 

"I could have bought fried chicken with that money."

 

Baek-Ya checked the time as he left the fortune-telling shop.

 

'It's been five minutes since I entered…?'

 

He sighed at the thought of spending 10,000 won per minute. It was easily the dumbest expense of the year.

But wasn't Forbes supposed to be a well-reputed foreign economic magazine? It seems like that too is now a thing of the past.

There was a bitter taste in his mouth.

It was easier when he was in the army since all he had to do was do as he was told. But when he came back to society, it felt like he was thrown into the middle of a war zone.

 

'Is this what it means to have the military ingrained into you…?'

 

He wasn't sure what to think of that.

Baek-Ya's face quickly darkened.

Even if he voluntarily enlisted, it was only because there was nothing else he wanted to do, and so he chose the next best option. Besides, it wasn't a place to stay for long.

 

'Anyway, what am I going to do for a living now…'

 

All his friends had already decided on their career path in their last year of high school. He was the only one who still couldn't decide.

Baek-Ya began to absentmindedly wonder if he should have gone to a fortune teller a little earlier in life.

 

"Can anyone just become an idol…"

 

In fact, if he was two years younger, he might have just gone for the challenge. Still, wasn't he known among his friends as the one who could sing? Baek-Ya unwittingly mulled over the fortune teller's words.

However, the current Korean idol market was already saturated. Even for the 3rd generation idols, who were currently in their prime, the average trainee life was six years.

Moreover, the average age was getting younger and younger, making the minimum age for idol debut very low…

 

'I guess it's too late now, right?'

 

However, it was better late than never. Baek-Ya, feeling strangely confident, took out his cell phone.

When he turned on the screen, he was greeted with a pile of messages from his friends.

 

[Shin Jae-Hyun: I can't believe Baek-Ya is already discharged ㅠㅠ You worked hard!]

[Kim Yu-Gyeong: You managed to escape the island ㅋㅋㅋ]

[Kim Yu-Gyeong: Early is good~ You for real got discharged at 21 ㅋㅋㅋㅋ]

[Shin Jae-Hyun: 7 pm today in Hongdae, right?]

 

The two people called him over, saying that they had to celebrate his discharge from the army. Baek-Ya cheerfully smiled as he checked the messages.

 

'Come to think of it, it's almost time for these guys to enlist.'

 

He had to tease them once they met.

 

[Me: Yeah! See you later.]

 

After excitedly responding, Baek-Ya pressed on a portal site app. He looked around, checking his surroundings for a moment, then his fingers quickly tapped the keys.

 

[How to become an idol]

 

It was an opportunity to store some knowledge. Despite the rough search, there was a flood of results.

Baek-Ya tapped on the topmost post. It was the latest post uploaded yesterday.

 

===========================

[Question] How to become an idol like AIM ㅠㅠ (It's urgent)

I am a 5th grader whose dream is to be an idol. I am looking for some advice…!

1. I'm 155 cm and 42 kg, but I'm going to grow taller, so it should be okay, right?

2. My looks range from average to teeny tiny bit handsome.

3. I can decently sing all of AIM's songs, but I've never learned to dance, so I'm not so sure… but I think I can be good at dancing.

4. That's it. Then, I look forward to your answers.

===========================

 

There were four comments.

 

- If it's AIM, you're referring to the most popular boy group these days! In that case, wouldn't it be better to join the same agency? ID Entertainment holds auditions every Saturday, so you might want to give it a try. (Application request ^^)

- If you're good-looking, go to ID. If you've got skills, go to US. If you rap well, go to HITIC audition.

- If you're just a teeny tiny bit handsome then ID is going to be difficult ㅠ (They're famous for the visuals) Instead, HITIC doesn't look at your appearance, so I'd recommend it^^ Still, you seem confident in your skills~

- There's not anything else needed. Idol = Handsome. In that case, take care of yourself.

 

But looking at it, there was one thing that kept coming up. Appearance. Baek-Ya looked at his reflection in the subway screen door.

Thick horn-rimmed glasses with messy grass-like hair that just started to grow. Skin tanned from his time in the military service.

 

"Mm…"

 

It was a terrible world.

For Baek-Ya, there was an insurmountable mountain, which was the 'appearance'.

 

"Okay. Get yourself together, Han Baek-Ya. This idol subject is pointless."

 

Baek-Ya vigorously shook his head to clear his thoughts. He got swept by the fortune teller's words and almost created a dark history for himself.

Then, at that moment. A comment appeared in real-time. It was an advertisement for an idol cultivation game.

 

- (๑و•̀ω•́)و An opportunity to reverse your life! I want to be an idol! Survive as the genius idol ▶ Download Now NEW

 

'You're telling me to go play the game because it'd be difficult to become an idol in real life? People really are so mean.'

 

Besides, he felt weird because the timing seemed like this was addressed to him. Baek-Ya fumingly pressed on the link.

 

'Who do you think you are!'

 

The download went directly to the App Store and proceeded. Perhaps used as the model, the game's introduction showed an advertisement for an idol group.

 

"Whoa… Are they even human?"

 

Good looking, they were really good-looking.

These were faces he had seen several times, performing before and after the popular girl groups, when he was in the military.

 

'Were they called Daisy? Dayz? I guess it was a rather generic name.'

 

ID Entertainment's first boy group in eight years after AIM. However, because the performance was poorer than expected, the group was also called 'ruined idols'.

 

[<Survive as a Genius Idol> is an idol cultivation game.

The future of your group depends on your skills. Challenge yourself to become a genius idol with Star Points acquired through quests~!

Well then, let's survive! ٩(ˊᗜˋ*)و]

 

The game had a grand introduction.

Baek-Ya, wearing an awkward smile, this time looked through the ratings and reviews.

 

[Everything is fine, but you will die no matter what you do ★]

[My kids are pretty ★★★★★]

[I worked hard to raise the sunfish, but died 100 times and lost my money ★]

[Synonym for a shitty game of luck ★]

[Is there anyone who has seen an ending other than death? ★]

 

There was no need to say more about the ratings. The reviews were also harsher than he has ever seen.

 

"Roughly looking, seems like there are a lot of complains because of the ending."

 

Death due to failing to debut. Death due to stress. Death for getting caught up with rumors. Death in a traffic accident due to avoiding a stalker fan. Death due to a concert hall accident, et cetera. They died for a variety of reasons.

In one review, they said that they were raising a sunfish, and truly, there was no sunfish such as this. He didn't think survival really meant surviving to live. It was a waste of data.

Baek-Ya thought back to how he reflected on himself just a few minutes ago. And then, as he was about cancel the download, his phone screen switched to some flashy graphics.

The download has been completed in the meantime.

 

[Please enter your stage name.]

 

"What the? Why can't I turn this off?"

 

He tried pressing the home button several times to quit the game, but it didn't work. Perhaps it was because of the tutorial mode…

After much contemplation, Baek-Ya decided to proceed with the game only until the end button appeared.

 

▶ Stage name: Baek-Ya

 

As he pressed 'confirm', a small message appeared at the bottom, saying that the synchronization would proceed.

 

[Synchronizing <Baek-Ya>.]

 

'Wasn't there a review earlier asking for some integration…?'

 

[62%]

[82%]

[…99%]

 

Then things went dark.

 

* * *

 

"Hey, Baek-Ya. Han Baek-Ya!"

His shoulders were erratically shaken. Baek-Ya let out a pained sound and raised his bowed-down body.

 

"Uuh…"

 

He felt his forehead that felt like it was going to break.

 

"Come to your senses now."

"Can't you sleep without your glasses? Someone would think you'd die without them."

 

Baek-Ya heard the voices of two people that reminded him of his school days. It was Jae-Hyun and Yu-Gyeong.

 

'Did I go straight to Hongdae? I'm pretty sure the last thing I remember is getting on the subway…'

 

Slowly opening his eyes, Baek-Ya looked in front of him. Then an unimaginable development unfolded.

 

"Wh-what, what is this?!"

 

Clang-clang-crash!

Even though he only stood up, the chair flew with a loud crash. The two people standing nearby were also surprised by the sudden acceleration.

 

"You, you crazy bastard! You scared me!"

"Wow… My liver almost fell out. Your sleeptalk is loud."

 

When he opened his eyes, he found himself at school, wearing his high school uniform.

 

'High school? What is this? Am I dreaming?'

 

But wasn't it too vivid to be a dream? The sensations were too distinct.

However, it seemed like the two weren't willing to wait for him any longer.

They grabbed Baek-Ya's wrist, who looked even more stupid today and dragged him by force.

Where? To the Jjangmanna snack bar.

 

"Wh-where are we going?"

"This guy is especially dumb today. Are you sick somewhere?"

"I was supposed to treat you to tteokbokki today. You said that you're definitely eating fast food today."

 

Jae-Hyun slapped Baek-Ya on the back and laughed.

 

"Hey. Seems like he can't eat much today seeing how he hasn't come to his senses."

 

At those words, Yu-Gyeong pumped his fist and shouted 'Nice'. He didn't forget to say that Baek-Ya's leftovers would be his either.

However, when they arrived, the snack bar was already full.

For a moment, the three stood there, side by side in front of the stand, faulting that it was all because Baek-Ya procrastinated.

 

"Three tteokbokki, two assorted fritters, one sundae, and one tonkatsu, please."

 

Yu-Gyeong applauded at Jae-Hyun's order. The fish cake soup in the paper cup was already in his mouth.

 

"Puhah."

 

That sight convinced Baek-Ya that this was a dream after all.

 

'He has never done it again ever since burning his lips once like that.'

 

Baek-Ya, who felt much more at ease, looked at Jae-Hyun and spoke.

 

"Can I have some of the Pi*chu cutlets?"

"Oh, my. Are you finally more sober? Sure. Eat a lot."

//TN: Pikachu-shaped tonkatsu (pork cutlets). Pikachu was censored in the original chapter due to copyrights.

 

As soon as he began to speak, the spicy Pi*chu was terrifyingly placed in front of him. It was a little disappointing that he couldn't taste it because it was a dream.

Baek-Ya took a big bite, thinking that he should really come here once he woke up from his dream.

Then at that moment, a white status window appeared before his eyes.

 

[The synchronization gift has arrived!]

▶ Confirm

 

"…Huh?"

 

Surprised, Baek-Ya stumbled backward. The Pi*chu in his mouth fell to the ground.

It was an unbelievable situation even when it happened right in front of his eyes. In the meantime, the letters in front of him changed once more.

 

[Obtain an exclusive title! <Genius Idol>]

[Skill Selection Draw (5 Times)]

▶ Draw Basic Skill (Free)

 

Confetti burst out as soon as the gift box opened.

 

"…A draw?"

 

He muttered out loud without even realizing it. However, the system, which recognized Baek-Ya's actions as 'acceptance', immediately proceeded with the draw.

 

[Skill Acquired!]

[<Sunfish (R)>, <Three Ggang a Day (A)>, <When a Nerd Removes His Glasses (B)>, <A Courting Dance (D)>

※ All skills acquired while the window is blank are automatically equipped.]

▶ Confirm

                 Draw Additional Skill (5 Times)

//TN: Three Ggang a Day is a Korean meme. Ggang is the name of Bi(Rain)'s music video and doing "Three Ggang a day" means you're watching the MV three times a day. It has like "You have to watch GGang every day to be cultured" kind of meaning.

"W-what is this?"

 

Baek-Ya shouted at the status window. He looked as if he had seen a ghost. However, Jae-Hyun and Yu-Gyeong saw this a little differently.

 

"…Are you crazy?"

"Ki- Kim Yu-Gyeong. Hey, don't you guys see this? There's something about skills!"

 

Baek-Ya pointed at the air and glanced back and forth between the two.

 

"…Skill?"

 

Turning his fork, Jae-Hyung looked at Baek-Ya with strange eyes.

Unknowingly, Baek-Ya took off his glasses and wiped them on his school uniform's shirt. There must have been something on his glasses.

But before he could wipe his glasses clean, a strong grip lifted up his face.

 

"What's this? Who are you?"

"Uh, huh?"

 

Yu-Gyeong's eyes were in disbelief.

 

"I'm Baek-Ya, who else would I be?"

 

Flustered, Baek-Ya shook off Yu-Gyeong's arm. Then this time, Jae-Hyun grabbed both of Baek-Ya's cheeks.

 

"Hey. Why do you wear glasses?"

 

Was it Shin Jae-Hyun this time?

With his glasses off, his friends and the surroundings were all blurry.

 

"What are you guys doing? Obviously, because my eyesight is bad…"

 

However, even in the midst of this, the status window was clearly visible. Everything else was blurry and only the status window was clear.

It was a confusing space. He had a strong feeling that it would keep hovering there until he chose an option.

Acting like he was putting his glasses back on, he swiftly hovered his finger over 'Confirm', and the status window disappeared.

 

"This bastard is damn handsome!"

 

He could tell without looking. All eyes within 50 meters radius were focused on him.

 

"Wha- what are you talking about, you crazy bastard? Just eat the tteokbokki!"

 

Baek-Ya shook off Yu-Gyeong's hand and quickly put on his glasses. Then, with his head down, he began to combatively eat his Pi*chu cutlet. It felt like his face was going to burst from all the stares and glances.

 

'They really have many ways to make fun of people.'

 

As Baek-Ya was getting furious for being teased even in his dreams. A man approached Baek-Ya from the side.

 

"Excuse me, student. Do you go to school here?"

"…What about it?"

 

Baek-Ya raised his head as he was eating the Pi*chu. Then a business card was held out in front of him.

 

"I happened to pass by and see you remove your glasses. Have you ever thought of becoming a celebrity?"

 

Was this the street casting he has been hearing about? No, he might be getting swindled again.

The guys with him were hyper-excited, unintelligibly shouting under their breath.

 

"Uoooock!"

"Oooh!"

"Haa…"

 

It was humiliating.

Baek-Ya felt like hiding in a rat hole. Subtly glaring at his friends, Baek-Ya sighed and politely refused.

 

"I'm sorry. I'm not really made for that."

 

He knew better than anyone else when it came to his face without his glasses, an extremely ordinary high school boy. Nothing more, nothing less.

But the man didn't seem to want to give up easily.

 

"Have you ever heard of ID Entertainment? It's the agency behind the idol group AIM."

"I have heard of it. But I don't have any money even at home, so…"

"Oh, no! Our company does not make any monetary demands on our trainees. It's 100% supported by the company, and we are in the process of creating our next boy group, so I would really love it if you came for an audition even if it's casually…"

 

The moment the man was earnestly talking. The disappeared status window reappeared.

 

[A new quest has arrived!]

[Q. I want to become an idol! (1) : Accepting the audition offer]

▶ Yes, I will try it out

     An audition?

 

'A quest?'

 

It was like a game.

This time, it seems like there were two options to choose from, but of course, there was no option to refuse.

 

'At least the second option is close to a refusal.'

 

Baek-Ya chose the second one without hesitation. Then the corresponding text flowed out of his mouth.

 

"An audition?"

 

What is this?!

Bewildered, Baek-Ya covered his mouth with both hands and glared at the status window.

 

"Yes! There is no need to think too hard about it. You just have to simply sing a song, dance, and do a camera test."

'…Just where in the world is that supposed to be simple?'

 

Baek-Ya once again refused. The status window disappeared, and a look of disappointment washed over the man's face.

 

'Is it finished?'

 

The moment he glanced at the man with relief, the status window popped up again as if to mock him.

And Baek-Ya decided. On what you ask?

 

"Huh?! There's an elephant!"

 

To flee.

 

"Wa- wait a minute! Student!"

 

It was an abrupt chase.

 

* * *

 

Baek-Ya hid in the toilet of the subway station.

At one point, the status window repeatedly disappeared and reappeared but now it was completely gone. It seemed that he had succeeded in getting rid of the man.

 

"Ueck."

 

Baek-Ya rinsed his mouth with cold water, battling the occasional bout of nausea.

He thought his heart was going to jump out of his mouth, but after a few rinses, he managed to calm down a little. And this time, the water droplets splashed onto his glasses, obscuring his view.

 

'It's a dream so why is this so hard?'

 

Baek-Ya thought as he took off his glasses. It seemed like the him in reality was having sleep paralysis.

 

"So, why did I have to go to that fortune teller…"

 

He reasonably suspected that the dream must have been because of the fortune teller.

It looks like he had fallen asleep on the subway but wasn't sure if he would end up at the last stop…

Baek-Ya muttered and absentmindedly raised his head. Then he locked eyes with the beautiful boy in the mirror.

 

"…Hmh?"

 

However, there was something a bit strange about this. When he looked to the right, the man also looked to the right, and when he looked to the left, the man also looked to the left.

Was it like… you and me, decalcomania?

 

"…No way."

 

Baek-Ya's eyes trembled.

After checking several times that there was no one around him. He gently lifted his finger and poked at the mirror.

And then the ET, no, Michelangelo's creation of heaven and earth unfolded right in front of his eyes.

 

"That's me?!"

 

No matter how much he was beautified in a dream, wasn't that just way too much!

It seems like the fortune teller's words have been quite shocking to him.

 

"Handsome as hell!"

 

Well, it still felt good.

 

"Should I get plastic surgery like this when I wake up from my dream?"

 

No. In reality, there existed the law of template immutability. This was only possible now because it was a dog's dream.

//TN: The law of template immutability = in plastic surgery, it means that you cannot change the shape of your original form with just a little plastic surgery.

 

With his mind straightened, Baek-Ya left the toilet. A face that wasn't really his, there was no point to keep looking at it as it would only leave him with a regretful attachment.

Anyway, he couldn't even touch the tteokbokki and the fritters because of that ahjussi.

//TN: Ahjussi = uncle, a middle-aged man

 

"That Pi*chu was delicious though…"

 

Licking his lips, Baek-Ya casually passed through the ticket gate.

 

'I think it was around this time of the year that I was living at nuna's house.'

//TN: Nuna = older sister, or a woman who's a bit older, the title is used by males

 

Looking at the subway map, Baek-Ya headed for Apgujeong, where his older sister would be.

 

//TN: The name 'sunfish' is a reference to a game called "Survive! Mola Mola" where the sunfish that you have to protect dies from basically anything.